With safety issues still top of mind for real estate professionals across the country since the tragic death of Arkansas agent Beverly Carter in September, we’ve received tons of emails from readers who speak heroically about their own harrowing tales of facing danger in the field. But one in particular touched our hearts: Celeste Barr, GRI, ABR, an agent with Keller Williams Success Realty in Barrington, Ill., wrote to us in response to our blog post about Carter, and she told us of an attack she luckily escaped back in 1991. Barr spoke of the shame she felt as a result of her attack and her long journey to self-empowerment in the years following. She has an important message for all REALTORS® who aim to be safer on the job.
Here’s her full letter:
Back when I was a newer agent in 1991 — I had only been in the business for two years — I, too, was attacked. A “buyer” attacked me in the basement of a home. I got away. I was one of the lucky ones.
For years, I felt ashamed, and, at the time, I didn’t tell anyone what happened. I thought I had done something wrong that gave him permission to do what he did. But I didn’t. I thought I should have seen this coming and that I was to blame. I didn’t, and I wasn’t. I finally shared my story with a family member and learned it wasn’t my fault. The “buyer” was going to find someone to attack, whether it was me or someone else.
If I were to give any advice to anyone in our community of REALTORS®, it would be to listen to your gut more. We’re all so eager to get the next deal; we’re not listening. Even as our gut is screaming, we think it won’t be us.
If a buyer is giving you more attention than is comfortable to you, assume there is a reason. Plan ahead and have a way out, even if all you have is a lame excuse to leave. You really need to keep a safe zone between you and the client. Have a way out! Keep an open door for YOU!
Being physically attacked creates a myriad of emotions, just like a death does. In my experience, anger has been one of the hardest feelings to overcome — anger at myself for being so stupid and vulnerable. It’s not a rational emotion, but it is real. It allows me now to be prepared before I meet with the public and speak with authority, and to not be a victim.